Stock, aching and what a man
Published: 13 March, 2023
I had a visit from an old associate earlier this week – High Street Ken. He’s a local car dealer who was, until quite recently, based on our local high street, until the value of the plot in terms of putting in flats became to obvious to ignore, and he sold up and moved his operation to an edge-of-town site like mine. After all, with the internet, you don’t really need a shop window like he had. Besides, he owned the building outright so my rich friend has become richer. Apart from the location of his business, it was ironic that he really is called Ken, in that his wife’s name is Barbara…
Anyway Ken was looking to send some MOTs my way. What with our missing out on some future bookings after Mrs P accidentally shut down our Facebook page at the start of the year, we did unexpectedly have some stretch, so we worked out an arrangement. We don’t do his servicing, which he has done himself, but I do sometimes give some support on tricky diagnostic issues that his guys just can’t get to the bottom of. He’s not just High Street Ken because of where he was based; his stock was always what you would call aggressively mainstream. If it was pop music it would be Stock, Aitkin and Waterman. No, not Dennis Waterman; Kylie and Jason and all that. Back in the day his showroom was like a trip back five years to the local Ford outlet. Now it’s as if you have fallen down a hole and woken up in South Korea. So much KIA, so little time. I have always been amazed at his ability to totally shift the skills-set of his little team to whatever is popular, and then shift again when things are heading that way. I remember when all the cars there all seemed to be Peugeot, and he found this guy who probably had Talbot branded on his, well, never mind where, but he had followed through and was a Peugeot expert, and he helped shift them over. Then there was his Honda-heavy period when local wags in the trade suggested that he change the name of the dealership to “Sea of Japan” due to the sheer number of H-badges on display. Ken always saw where things were going, and shifted with the tide. I think we all do the same, but with him selling cars it was more obvious. He has also been very successful at it.
The funny thing is, despite the ongoing popularity and dominance of German marques, he’s never gone that way. I remember he had a visceral dislike of the venerable Beetle though. Maybe that’s why. Also, anything niche will really throw them. When they do a part-exchange on anything really exotic (it has happened, strangely) we have often benefitted by getting the work.
With winter on its way out, slowly as always, the aches and pains associated with the season are easing, so maybe I will be inclined to help him the next time he finds himself in possession of some sort of ridiculous European oddity.
- Accept all cookies?
I was feeling peckish at the end of the day yesterday – well it was nearly closing time, so I headed for the biscuit tin. A hobnob or a digestive or some sort of cookie will usually give me another 20 minutes, and perhaps an extra inch within my overalls around the waist, but I digress. However, when I got to our little kitchen, the cupboard was locked. This was a double-surprise to me as last week it was your average common-or-garden kitchen unit. However, come Monday it sported a shiny new heavy-duty padlock. This was Mrs P’s way of telling me that the diet she was making me go on was non-negotiable.
- How to disappear completely
I’m not here. This isn’t happening. Or, I might as well not be – No, really. Over the last few days, here at Parkit Motors we noticed a steep drop-off on fresh customers making enquiries. We continued to be booked up, but the backlog we had before Christmas seemed to start dissipating. Initially, I put this down to better time management on the part of the team, and everyone completing their jobs faster. Then I looked at the jobsheets, and realised that everything was happening at the same speed as usual, sometimes slower actually. Just leafing through these and looking at the times logged on some of these very simple tasks, words will certainly need to be had with…Arthur…oh that’s awkward, moving on.
- The Holly and the Arthur
Christmas is upon us again here at Parkit Motors. A time of joy, the Season of Goodwill, twinkly lights and a tree in Reception, winter checks reminders decked out in red going out via email, and the staff Christmas party to arrange. Well, I’m not too sure about some of this. To be honest, with the rising cost of energy, and everything else I think we will have to pass on it this year. No, don’t call me Scrooge, I’m not completely stone-hearted. We could probably afford sausage rolls with a sprig of holly in to give to the staff before we close on Christmas Eve. Maybe a glass or two of Mulled Wine too, for those who are not driving…
- To the manner born?
I recently had a visit from someone I knew when I was a teenager who also ended up in the trade; Local classic car dealer Piers Bonnet. Of course, I know what you are thinking; “His name is Bonnet? Of course he was destined for this business.” Well, you’d think that, except it is pronounced ‘Bon-nay’ as in ‘Bon-nay Prince Char-lay’. Yes, it’s all a bit Keeping Up Appearances, but who am I to tell him (well, more specifically his parents years ago) how to pronounce their own name. It could have been worse; I seem to remember being told they nearly went double-barrelled as the Morgan-Bonnets. He really would have been doomed to be a classic car dealer then.
- Scary times?
Scary times eh? No, I’m not talking about Halloween, about which Mrs P has been her usual decorative self, I’m talking about the last two years, well nearly three years now. The pandemic, lockdowns, reopening, parts supply issues, manpower shortages, the war in Ukraine, the cost of living crisis, surging fuel prices, the list goes on.
